19
Jun
09

Stuff Posh People Like

No, none of you have read http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.com/. I am sure of it. Not even whacko, who pointed it out to me who I showed it to.

This isn’t exactly a copy of the thing, more or less a SWPL like look at the incense-sticks-from-odel types in SL.

Trains – The local railway system has it’s roots in colonial times. That’s a pretty good reason for any erstwhile posh person to like the railway. Anything British is High Class and/or Respectable. But they face the slight conundrum of local trains being, for want of a better word, raggedy. This goes against any self respecting posh person’s rule of “Never be seen anywhere raggedy, unless you’re standing on a poor person”.

Anything in Odel – The few times I go in there I am amazed at the similarities of most products to that found in, well, pettah(see next item). Except that they have a price at least 100% higher than their non-sold-at-a-fleecers brethren. This, of course, lets posh people get cheap things for higher prices, which instantly makes said cheap thing much more presentable. For example, Plain white t-shirts are rapidly transformed into ‘base fashion components’ when anย  ‘OD=L’ stamp is stuck on.

Fort/Pettah – This area of our beloved country faces the same fate as Trains. No wonder then that most trains start at Fort. Of all forts, only the Galle fort and a few other small forts are deemed posh enough for being traversed, on foot, by any posh person worth his/her Perrier. It’s romantic colonial roots are now covered in muddy alleys and electronics shops. the lone museum attracts the occasional tourist.

Sales – Posh people just adore sales. But not real sales. They merely buy things at sales which bring the prices of goods down to their regular price, as the selling price at Places Posh People Shop are much higher than average. Anything less would be an embarrassment to wear.

Expensive Coffee – Barista and Coffee bean are high on the list of any posh person for a place to “chill”. Any regular person cannot really chill knowing that their wallets are being slowly run into the ground. As such, only a truly posh person “Chills” when ordering anything more than a brownie. A whole group of people, and you can be assured that they are at least distantly related to the Queen of England.

Hikkaduwa – Better known to most posh people in it’s castrated form, “Hikka”. This is a godforsaken place by the beach, dry as the serengheti, with about as much appeal to a human as that same desert and with nothing special going for it except that you are slightly less likely to be assaulted by German paedophiles if caught wondering about in the night there. Perfect place for an overpriced party. Most posh people will try to get special tickets which will keep them away from the ‘posh'(pronounced like cho/floor/door/ghost) people, who merely strive to be real posh. These tickets will be at least thrice the cost of a regular ticket, and provides them with special rooms for staying away from the mere middle class. The fact that any normal ticket for a place like Hikkaduwa should cost around Rs. 20 causes great pleasure to posh people, as spending more money on something cheap is just fabulous.

Eating regular food, then blogging about it – Something that causes a great stir in the world of the Posh People is eating regular Sri Lankan food, like dhal and pol-sambol. Even more eventful is blogging about it. A popular eatery for this is “Pilawoos”, an establishment where food is cooked the same as any other cheap roadside eatery, but, again, is priced much higher. If this fact alone didn’t reel them in, the service of bringing the eatables to the customer in a waiting vehicle does so with much success. This ensures that the posh people not adventurous enough to go into a place where the dirt on the tables is wiped off using a cloth which has more dirt on it than the intended surface it is to sanitize are able to eat said overpriced eatables as well.

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28 Responses to “Stuff Posh People Like”


  1. 1 Cadence
    June 19, 2009 at 1:22 pm

    Errrm.

    Hmmmmmmm.

    Okaay. I.like.post.very much.

    …though I disagree with the sales bit. Most overtly posh ppl won’t be caught dead at a sale.

  2. June 19, 2009 at 2:06 pm

    I’ve read it. There’s loads of different variations of this site now – nearly one for all ethnicities! :

  3. 3 black
    June 19, 2009 at 2:08 pm

    LOL! ๐Ÿ˜€ u and your sarcasm.

  4. June 19, 2009 at 2:21 pm

    @Cadence
    Oh, I wouldn’t know, not being posh and all…
    ๐Ÿ˜›
    ๐Ÿ˜€

    @Scrump
    Oh. first stumbled across just the book. Didn’t realize there was an entire blog…

  5. 6 james
    June 19, 2009 at 2:24 pm

    Totally disagree with you about Hikkaduwa, sounds like you’ve had a bad experience and are venting a bit here…

  6. 7 Posh Bugger
    June 19, 2009 at 2:38 pm

    U 4got Barefoot, cheap handwoven sarong and gifts made of coconut shell sold by dollar and not rupee. Then there is Ramzi Rehman, a gay dude apparently a barber managing 2 earn a merc courtesy of Colombo seven posh crowd. Waaaiiiiiit, how about Mcdonalds, bun and some “elavalu” no?

    Then lets not 4get stone n strings designer jewellery coz its just silver imitation imported from a cheap chinese sunday market.

    Posh i can tell U is fashion……….. !!!

    Latest trend is u need 2 be a blogger, if u aren’t then u aren’t all dat posh. U R Godeysish ๐Ÿ™‚

  7. June 19, 2009 at 2:50 pm

    @james
    I would have to have been there to have a bad experience ๐Ÿ˜€ Only passed the place a few times and it’s always been pretty bleak looking to me. Besides, all on this blog is to be taken with a pinch of salt. Or a kilo.

    @A sane voice
    why do you keep changing your name?
    You’re sounding more and more like that dude i mentioned in the earlier comment.

  8. 9 A sane voice
    June 19, 2009 at 2:59 pm

    Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ass ๐Ÿ™‚
    Which guy? Who? Dude, i use a Wimax, that is dynamic IP machang, chances are U’ve got nothing 2 base yr claims on though WordPress does allow IP tracking link. Sad no? better luck next time, but yes i admit all three are me, that is idiot, posh bugger and sane voice…….. Sorry i had 2 use different names coz i was commenting on many different blogs simultaneoulsy. Honest, but u are mistaken again, whichever guy u r refering 2, i’m closer 2 u than u’d ever imagine. Close circles n prank plays? Let me call u 2day anyway.

    • June 19, 2009 at 4:35 pm

      I don’t need an IP address to recognize a particular kind of retard when I see one ๐Ÿ˜‰
      If you are indeed one of my dumbass friends, call me now, I’ll make sure I kick you in the nads next time I see you.

  9. June 19, 2009 at 3:08 pm

    It’s people like you who create stereotypes and class differences! ROT IN HELL!!!

    ๐Ÿ˜› kidding

  10. 12 hijinx
    June 19, 2009 at 3:18 pm

    >sticks nose in air< You are desecrating our way of life. Begone, fiend.

  11. June 19, 2009 at 3:50 pm

    yeah i never heard of it til now! amazing innit, theres a museaum in Pettah ??

  12. June 19, 2009 at 4:04 pm

    Funny, i like it. although i am not posh at all but every time i went to sri lanka and I went to sri lanka a million times, locals always took me to Odel, I dont know why.

  13. June 19, 2009 at 4:36 pm

    @MoM
    ๐Ÿ˜›

    @jinx
    Oppressor of the people! ๐Ÿ˜›

    @Whack
    yeah, there’s something there… I think Dili knows of it. Or someone.

    @Tazeen
    Foreigners = Odel.
    ๐Ÿ˜€

  14. 17 Chavie
    June 19, 2009 at 4:44 pm

    I’ve never been inside a Barista, let alone drink coffee from one… Guess I’m goday then! oh well… ๐Ÿ˜› ๐Ÿ˜€

  15. June 19, 2009 at 5:10 pm

    @TheWhacksteR – It’s the old Town Hall turned into a museum. You can see wax figures of the old counsel there, seated at a table and looking all important.

  16. June 19, 2009 at 5:24 pm

    hahaaa.. good one. enjoyed it.. this brightened up my ‘very bad’ day at work..:)

  17. June 19, 2009 at 10:33 pm

    you forgot BATA slipper-look alikes albeit in crazy colours for 750 bucks a piece + a posh name.

  18. June 20, 2009 at 12:59 am

    heh ๐Ÿ˜€ i like this post.

  19. 22 chathuraw
    June 20, 2009 at 5:03 pm

    Haha… I like this post too :D….

    Chill at Coffee Bean? Barista is kinda ok… But coffee bean? *gulp*

  20. June 21, 2009 at 1:22 am

    Now now get back to work, Being Posh doesn’t come for free….

  21. June 21, 2009 at 8:18 am

    Agree with most of em.. infact you missed “Coffee Stop” on ur list..

    Buutt. I’d say u need to experience hikka, b4 you comment on it. It’s a truly worthy feeling. And I’m not ref to the stoopid parties. There’s much mre you can do… for us normal folk..

  22. June 22, 2009 at 9:10 am

    @Chav
    You’re a student, you’re not rich enough for it ๐Ÿ˜›

    @PB
    Wax figures?!

    @LD
    Thanks!

    @DC
    Yeah, didn’t realize they existed O.o

    @MC
    And you DON’T like the others? ๐Ÿ˜ฎ

    @Chathura
    It’s not ok when you order a beverage and a brownie, and it gets you 800 bucks on the bill :/

    @RSZ
    ๐Ÿ˜›
    Those were accidental expeditions

    @CM
    Yeah, those included…
    Re Hikka, I dunno… wouldn’t any place along the beach have the same stuff? Or do they have some special thing? :S

  23. June 22, 2009 at 11:09 am

    It needs to be experienced mate.. I would do serious injustice if I attempt to describe it in words..


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